In a world where remakes are the rule, not-shaving for a week makes you as scary as David Hess. Judging by the photos, the new version of "Last House on the Left" is about a bunch of Williamsburg hipsters who embark on a lustful rampage of rape and murder after imbibing too many Pabst Blue Ribbons at a loft party. For the love of Deity, people! The female heavy is wearing fashion overalls.
Let's face it--what we all *really* want to know is who's filling Martin Kove's shoes as the bumbling, comedic deputy. I'm on the edge of my seat. Believe that, meine Freunde.