Thriller: A Cruel Picture [1974]

If you've ever pondered precisely how dull a movie about a woman who's sold into white slavery and eventually wreaks her bloody revenge on her pimp and clientele could be, then "Thriller: A Cruel Picture" provides a bleak and interminable answer. This 1974 Swedish rape-revenge flick is notable insofar as the time I took to watch it ranks as one of the longest 107 minute periods of my life. Things are not going well in the Empire when, during the slow-motion violence sequences, I find myself bouncing in my chair and urging the film to HURRY UP ALREADY.


We'll begin at the beginning: a young girl is molested by a vagrant and is struck mute by the traumatic experience. Flash forward to fifteen years later--said girl is now a buxom young farm maid (played by sex starlet Christina Lindberg) who has been sheltered by her doting parents. On her way to an appointment with a doctor who is trying to cure her, she hitches a ride with A Very Oily Man. I'm sure you see where this is going. And thusly it goes, only in a way more boring manner than you can possibly anticipate, as the viewer is treated to a long sequence of The Very Oily Man taking our presumed protagonista out for dinner and drinks before knocking her out with a megadose of heroin. Seriously, this sequence feels *epic* and is shot almost entirely using mid-range shot framing.



Don't despair--eventually the girl is sold into white slavery and we get to see her boobs and some intercut hardcore sequences, as well as a grisly eyeball-slashing. Post-disfiguring, our mute heroine semi-complies with the law of the hooker land, and comes to be known as ONE EYE. She is subjected to a variety of degrading sexual situations, including that most dreaded of tortures, that of the hott lesbian boob-touching, and wreaks her eventual slo-mo revenge, As You Do. But... the virtual absence of a musical soundtrack combined with limited dialogue and bleakity-bleak-bleak cinematography just made me slack-jawed with boredom. I... just don't care. I really don't care if she makes it out of her life of forced prostitution, I don't care if there's more intercut hardcore, I don't care if she manages to shake her crippling drug habit--I DO NOT CARE AT ALL. Really. Is this some kind of freakish art film designed to make me achieve a level of not-caring to which I had previously been unable to attain? As such, it's incredibly effective.



I'll... try to hit some high points, such as they are:

• Some early POV shots add a creepy verite quality to the proceedings
• Aforementioned boobs are of a most excellent quality
• One Eye has a leather handbag with bullet pouches on it that I *totally* covet
• Her eyepatches always match her outfits, which I respect (pink nightie gets pink eyepatch, red skirt gets red eyepatch, and black trenchcoat gets black eyepatch--APPROVED)

I wanted to like this movie; I've seen similar movies and enjoyed them. Hell, this is the kind of movie that inspires people to get "Thriller: A Cruel Picture" tattoos, for heaven's sake! A couple of moments of arresting visual imagery are peppered throughout (those early POVs work well and the final revenge sequence is particularly effective), and by no means is this the WORST film I've seen but...

Thanks, I'll take "Ms. 45."